I am like most people and do a few things well. You know, “a Jill of all trades, master of none.” That is not really accurate but the things I have mastered are singularly specific. And that’s not the question.

My upbringing was non traditional in some ways and very traditional in others. My Filipina mom taught her daughters how to care for ourselves, and others. She taught my brothers how to be cared for. Very traditional in the Filipino culture. So I learned early on how to take care of myself in a very traditional sense of the word.

The difference came in the Americanization phase of my development. Filipino life in America is very different from life in The Philippines. There are aspects of Filipino culture that just don’t translate well, or need to be specifically adapted to the American way of life.

That, along with some changes to our household when I was a child, lead me down a distinctly different path than my siblings. My sisters paths took them down more traditional routes. Mine took a more circular route.

There was a lot of trial and error in terms of who I wanted to be and how I got there. There was no map or blueprint for the life I wanted for myself. I had no guides and mentors. Only I could see who I was and how I wanted to change.

I learned above all else, that I had to nurture and sustain myself independent of those who shared my path from the beginning. I learned that without my sense of health, mind and body, that who I wanted to be was never going to real.

What I am good at, most importantly and devoutly, is taking care of myself. Life has taught me that self care is the first step in being able to truly care for others.